Editor’s note: The short answer to this is the pervasive misogyny that permeates our society. Beyond reviewing food and documenting the gastronomy in Lagos, our duty is to report (and call out harmful and oppressive systems within the food industry).

Asterisked names in this piece have been changed to maintain anonymity.

Finding good food in Lagos can be a tedious mission since you run the risk of eating overcooked meat, undercooked food, and mold in really bad cases. Now, when you’re a woman - it gets worse. It’s a roulette of awful service from irritable waiters who imply you’re in no position to pay for your meal, or worse, being denied entry altogether.

On November 8, CNN producer, Aisha Salaudeen reported being denied entry into Harzoyka Restaurant because she was unaccompanied by a man.  According to her, she’d eaten there previously until the guards informed her of a new policy stating that all women visiting the restaurant must be accompanied by a man.

“It was my go-to place before the lockdown, but I’d always been accompanied by male friends. That was my first time going there with a woman”, said Salaudeen. 

Aisha escalated the incident via Twitter and the Federal Competition and Consumer Protection Commission (FCCPC) launched an investigation into the complaint. According to the official website, the commission issued a compliance notice and placed the restaurant under supervision for a limited period to ensure adequate training and oversight regarding illegal or prohibited parameters for denying access; and proper customer engagement and complaint resolution.
Prior to the intervention by the FCCPC, All News Nigeria reached out to the restaurant for comment, and they received a rather lackadaisical response from the manager who said that the policy was implemented because female customers occupy spaces for hours without buying food. He also stated that many of their “high profile clients” disliked “the girls” who linger around the restaurant.

On the reversal of the policy, Aisha says, “I think the fact that I escalated the incident helped. I don’t believe that they are truly sorry, because when the manager was first called about this issue he was still arrogant about how female customers never have money or buy expensive food.”

Aisha’s experience is one of many circumstances where restaurants deny service to women. Establishments such as Sailor’s Lounge and Radisson Blu have also been accused of harassing female customers. In late 2018, Flora* and three girlfriends were blocked at the entrance of Zenbah on the way to meet a male friend. 

 “That was my first time (there), but one of my friends had been there before but went with a guy. We got to Zenbah before our male friend, and we were about to go in when the security guard asked if we had a reservation. I was initially confused because I didn’t think Zenbah was the type of place where you had to book in advance. Since our friend hadn’t arrived,  we decided to wait for him outside. 

The problem started when I saw a woman and a man (& several couples after that) go in without the guard requesting their reservation details. We asked why he asked us for reservations, and he answered that the situation was different because he just can’t let four women go in like that. 

When our male friend arrived, he showed up with another female friend and the guard told him he could only go in with the girl he came with and not the rest of us that were there earlier. Eventually, my friends and I got frustrated and went back home.”

Despite living in Nigeria’s harsh economic conditions, women in the country make up a sizable portion of restaurant guests. Unfortunately, the misogyny the average Nigerian woman experiences also extends to social settings like restaurants. 

One common occurrence in restaurants is how servers dismiss their female half of their coupled guests, insisting on speaking directly to and specifically handing the bill to the male half of the couple, regardless of who asked for the bill. 

This stems from how our society views women with regard to their attachment to men. Here, the restaurant mirrors how respectability for women is hinged on male companionship. Some might argue that this is unintentional. However, it would be naive to ignore the power dynamics in this case, especially since it has to do with more than money. Erasure and dismissal is a covert form of discrimination. 

 “The usual thing is when you’re the one who asked the bill, and then they give the guy. There are times when I’m at a restaurant with my husband, and they just go straight to him even though I’m the one who has the ATM guard. There was a particular situation where my husband asked him (the server) to give me the bill, and he was so reluctant”, adds Salaudeen.

While it seems obvious to point fingers at establishment owners and managers, this behaviour cuts across all levels of service, from servers to guards. Whether they feel emasculated about serving a woman, or just don’t like seeing women having a good time, there’s a certain hostility women continue to experience from the gates.

Salaudeen described how the guards at Harzoyka also got physical as they accosted her at the entrance. “As I was going in, two security guards pulled me by my shoulder. They told me it was a new policy and that the only way I’d be allowed inside is if I go out and find a guy to accompany me”.

 With sexism ingrained into the very fibre of Nigerian society, it’ll be hard to make drastic changes in the long term. For many women, the sensible action is to disassociate themselves from establishments with sexist policies and ally with female customers when necessary. It goes without saying, but restaurants ought to implement enforceable workplace training that encompasses gender equality. 

In Ms. Salaudeen’s case, the FCCPC intervened but this is not the case all the time. It might be a lot to ask since nothing really works in Nigeria, but there should be sanctions put in place for restaurants and establishments that uphold discriminatory practices.

“I think one thing beyond awareness and training on how to deal with women would be, making an example - by the time restaurants are getting fined for discriminating against women, I think everyone else will begin to wake up,” adds Salaudeen finally.