It is Christmas season, and that means one thing; the abroad people are coming! ‘Tis the season for vaguely-accented toasting and the promise of foreign currency. These heartbreakers play hard, and they play to win.

We can’t say that we don’t see the appeal of fine boys with sharp haircuts and fine girls who bring all the mystery to the table. Meeting someone new is so exciting, and they certainly bring their A-game if you’re willing to overlook all the “innit”-flavoured conversations.

So what happens after the Show Dem Camp concerts, brunches at Flowershop Café and beach selfies? January comes around and suddenly, your bae is gone.

Nothing soothes a broken heart like food, and we’ve got the best alternatives especially for the January IJGB apocalypse:

Pasta is food for the soul; don’t listen to the fitfam haters. Smother that pain in creamy, savoury spaghetti topped with some fried chicken, and then step it down with one big coke. You deserve it.

Puff Puff

Anyone who knows anything will tell you that puff puff from Obalende is top two best puff puff in Lagos, and it ain’t number two. Stopping by after a long day at work (and stalking your IJGB bae’s Instagram), you need to buy at least N200’s worth-and this is key-make sure you finish it alone!

Instead of calling (or texting) them, stroll down to Hans and Rene and have a cup of gooey ice-cream goodness. Maybe two cups, you’re in emotional distress.

This is the perfect time for you and your friends to finally have that tour of ‘the best shawarma’ in your neighbourhood. Make it a nightly thing and try out all the joints till you find your fave, and do that for as long as it takes for you to forget them.

Wash down the bitter thoughts with a glass of wine (or two). Wine hits different when you’re drinking with friends and giving them the tea on your runaway bae. Guaranteed to also give you the courage to finally block them for your peace of mind.