Zoe’s Bistro

29 Glover Road, Ikoyi | Instagram | 0912 014 7746

I need to start off with this disclaimer: I’m not into the fine/semi-casual dining scene in Lagos. I’m the one who re-tweets the posts where angry diners suggest we all boycott Victoria Island restaurants and stick to spending 10k on dinner at some low-key, less glamorous, not-particularly-Instagrammable joint. This is because I believe and agree there’s something quite opportunistic about the majority of ‘upscale’ restaurants in Lagos — a lot of times, the goal is to exploit, and that just isn’t cool.

Nonetheless, I’m a food editor in Lagos and when yet another ‘bistro’ opens up, I have to put my grievances aside and do it for the culture — the food culture, that is.

Zoe’s Bistro (owned and sharing a space with La Cour Hotels) recently opened its doors. As I said, I quite like the set-up and spirit of the space. It’s well-lit, which is great for photos, and the building itself is shrouded in greenery, which is always adds a nice touch. Zoe’s seems like a great place for a breakfast date on brunch on Saturday.

Speaking of breakfast, the first thing that stood out to me on the menu was a delightful-sounding thing I’d never heard of called Cheesecake French Toast. I was fully prepared to try this thing and take great photos for y’all but that’s a story I’ll get to. Alongside this, I ordered Beef Sliders — because the more bread, the better — and a fruity mocktail called the Zoe’s, which is a combination of a bunch of juices and syrups.

I couldn’t have been more wrong about the French Toast. I was so convinced it wasn’t what I ordered that I assumed the server was heading to the table behind me, even though there was no one there. According to the menu, what I was supposed to get was French Toast topped “with fresh berries topped with cream cheese” and an assortment of typical breakfast accompaniments. Oh, I got the crispy (quite delicious, actually) bacon, nicely-salted scrambled eggs and those nasty artificial-meat hotdogs you find in shawarma alright, but where was my cream cheese? Berries, who?

It was quite the flop. Don’t call something Cheesecake French Toast if it’s just nice eggy-milk bread. If you’re going to charge nearly N10000 for this breakfast plate, come correct or don’t bother, kid.

The Beef Sliders, on the other hand, did what it said on the tin. I had them bagged because I assumed I’d be too full, but ended up having one at the restaurant. It was admittedly a bit cold and would have been lovelier if it was nice and warm, but it was still yum. The meat was tender, the vegetables were fresh and it was gone in a few bites. Job done.

I had my eye on the Duck Rolls, though and if there’s ever a next visit, I’d love to give those a try.

Completely taking me by surprise, what banged the most on my table was the Zoe’s mocktail. With all the syrup in there, it had the tendency to be overly sweet — and some people might find it is — but I loved it. I’d been driving for the last hour and it was just what I needed to feel a little refreshed.

My go-to at Lagos restaurants is always, always water because it’s just my preference and I’d rather save the calories for dessert, but I really enjoyed this one. Their drink prices are also not bad, I have to give them that. With the way the cost of simple cocktails be wildin’ these days, sadly, some credit here seems necessary.

postscript

I think Zoe’s Bistro serves tasty food; they might just need to work on delivering what’s promised and meeting up to expectations.

That Cheesecake mishap really fell their hand.

verdict

damage

Cheesecake French Toast — N9500

Beef Sliders — N9000

Zoe’s — N6000

parking

Adequate space for 6-7 cars