Smokey Bones Looks Different But Tastes The Same
8B Fabac Close, Victoria Island, Lagos
FOLLY: We've only been to Smokey Bones once and that was for the 4th of July special last year so we thought we owed it to them to review their real menu right?
NOSA: Smokey Bones has changed quite a bit since our original review. The space is more or less new. There's a lot more space, but even more ugly furniture. That said, it beats the cramped Smokey Bones of yore.
Anyway, we started off with the Chicken Wings
FOLLY: These Chicken Wings were unforgivable. I recently bought 2.81 kg of chicken wings for N3,372 (I went to check the receipt) and it yielded 73 wings. A lesser degree of robbery is Urban Fuxion who gives you 10 chicken wings and a side as well as a drink for N2000. So, in conclusion, N1800 for six starving chicken wings with no side is unforgivable.
NOSA: The wings were a bit to struggle-y for me, mate. Also struggle-y, was the waitress.
FOLLY: The waitress that served us deserves to be suspended or fired or put in the back so she never again is customer facing.
NOSA: Worst Waitress, 2016 Edition
Not only did she spill water all over the place, she completely messed up my order.
FOLLY: I had the Rib Tips with Cornbread and Coleslaw. My original order would have been pork spare ribs with mashed potatoes and coleslaw but they didn't have the spare ribs or the mash.
I don't understand rib tips as a concept. Nosa says they are the tips of the ribs as the name implies.
NOSA: I mean, what else could it be?
FOLLY: I guess it's nice cause they are boneless but they just strike me as the Asun of pork. Little cutlets of meat doused in your chosen sauce but it wasn't even as tender as Asun.
FOLLY: The coleslaw was very sweet almost like there was sugar or even honey in it, is that a thing? When I mixed it with the rib tips and its bbq sauce I really enjoyed the swalty taste that it created. The cornbread was also really good, more moist than crumbly and that's a good thing!
NOSA: The cornbread, I thought, was excellent relative to what Lagos has to offer, i.e. no cornbread at all. In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king etc etc
NOSA: For my main, I got the BBQ Chicken Sandwich with Mac n' Cheese. The sandwich is a customer favorite at Smokey Bones for good reason. The BBQ sauce and the 'slaw taste like they were made for each other. It works so so well.
NOSA: The Mac n' Cheese was a bit terrible. The mac was terribly mushy. It reminded me of the ones I had in boarding school. Maybe we should blame Dangote for this.
FOLLY: I asked for sweet potato pie for dessert but they didn't have any.
POSTSCRIPT
FOLLY: I like how open the space is after the redesign. I think the lighting is terrible, though, it's not even mood lighting or anything it just doesn't complement the space or how you view your food when it arrives.
NOSA: Smokey Bones has so much potential. I really wish I had some control over it because there's so much I want to change. From the shit service to the live band to the Nigerian section of the menu. Until Denise Renee's came in, Smokey Bones was the only place you could get food from the American South in Lagos so it's a bit of a shame that they aren't quite there yet.
FOLLY: I think the good and the bad balance each other out at Smokey Bones for a so-so conclusion.
VERDICT
DAMAGE
Rib Tips, Cornbread, & Coleslaw - N4500
BBQ Chicken Sandwich with Mac n' Cheese - N3000
PARKING
Extremely tight, and you'll have to do a three point turn.