Last week Thursday, my friend Dami shared this article in da group chat. Then Nosa shared this one. I then thought to myself, "hmmmm EDL readers would be very interested to learn what my food diary for one week might look like". I also felt it would help demystify the assumption that Nosa and I eat N8500 burgers for breakfast, lunch and dinner so I decided to do it. 

Friday

I’m fortunate enough to work at an atypical Nigerian office. Technically, we’re an American company. I don't feel comfortable saying exactly where I work so I'll just say the industry, it's a technology company.  Anyway, I’m digress, I'm mentioning this because I'm fortunate  to work at an office where I get two catered meals a day completely free of charge, as well as snacks twice a day. 

We usually have Digestives, HobNobs, So Yummy, Pringles, Reel fruit etc. Now, I didn’t eat breakfast so I was starving and the snack bar was all out of plantain chips when I went to check. Thankfully, my seat mate got one pack and was kind enough to share.

To Drink: Water.

If my seat mate notices my water bottle isn't emptying at the rate she'd like. She makes me drink it all at once and then refill and drink some more. She’s not literally my seat mate in the secondary school sense of the word, we just sit next to each other and call each other seat mates. She’s very sweet and you’d wish she was your seat mate too.

6 PM ish

Nosa and I are at La Taverna for our bottomless mimosas thing. While we're waiting for our guests to arrive, we order a bowl of tortilla chips and guacamole. Honestly, I had more Olmeca Chocolate shots than I can count. Margaritas, I probably did four. I wasn’t counting either.

To eat, I had both chicken and beef quesadillas, chicken wings, and chili con carne. Hold the judgement, I needed something to absorb the Olmeca. 

Daily Total: NGN 0

Saturday

It was a very rough morning for personal reasons. I drank some Vitamin water and ate a couple hob nob chocolate chip biscuits. 

Nosa treated me to Biscuitbone. I had the steak and egg toastie. I didn’t order a side because I always steal Nosa’s :) 

To Drink: Water. 

4.00 pm

I eat again at about 4pm when my dad and I went to Glover Court to buy chicken suya. They grill the bird whole and then chop it up for you when it’s cooked. This was my first time watching them make it but right before they chop it up, they dip the bird in a vat of oil (for flavor I guess) and boy it is delicious. I inhaled about 5 pieces of this and then wrapped up the leftovers for later consumption.

Evening

In the evening, I went for a friend’s birthday party.

While there I had a mishmash of stuff including Nosa’s drink (I don’t know what was in it), Coke, Sprite, potato chips, plantain chips, one meat, jollof rice, cake. Yeah, basically human dustbin because whatever was in front of me I ate, except chin-chin. I don’t like chin-chin. 

Daily Total: NGN 0

Nosa paid for the toastie - N2300 and my dad bought the chicken suya - N3000. 

Sunday

12.30 PM

I'm at the IMAX to watch Spiderman. I had a mix of sugar and salty popcorn. To drink is water, as usual. 

My dad had finished Saturday's chicken leftovers so we buy another bird (he pays again). 

I wolf this down even faster than I ate the previous days spoils. Again, we wrap up the left overs for later consumption. 

Daily Total: NGN 4000

This includes a N3500 IMAX 3D ticket. My dad buys the N3000 chicken.

Monday

The breakfast at my office is moin-moin and pap or something that's making the cafeteria smell so I forgo it. They used to serve pancakes and sausages for breakfast many moons ago but they’ve stopped now. It’s always yam, sweet potato, pap, or akara. 

You can read all about my lunch in this post. Basically, I ordered takeaway and it came at 4pm. I was hungry and furious. 

While I was waiting, I snacked on a lot of stuff including plantain chips, Reel Fruit NutMix, and salty jollof rice. All I drink is water. 

For dinner, I had Indomie and the left overs of our glover court suya chicken. The choice of Indomie was decided by necessity. I got home from the gym and was famished.

Daily Total: NGN 3000

Real money spent: NGN 0. EDL actually paid for that lunch.

Tuesday

After eating Indomie for dinner the previous day, this morning I’m starving. So, I stop being proud and I go to the cafeteria to check what is being served for breakfast. It’s plantain, yam and stew and I go for it. 

To Drink: You guessed it, water. 

I grab pack of So Yummy mid-morning from the snack bar. 

We’re running a series of food tastings in my office to find a new lunch vendor. I’m not in the food tasting club because I didn’t react quickly enough to the slack message. In spite of being the foremost 'food critic' in Lagos, there’s apparently no space for me still. Whatever. 

There was extra food today, so they called me to taste. I overlook the disrespect and hurried to taste.

I tried the yam porridge, fried rice, potatoes and curry chicken. It was pretty good and so I hope these guys become one of our new caterers. 

Just as I’m about to leave work I see my coworker with a loaf of bread and peanut butter and a mini crowd. I’m beggy-beggy so I decide to ask if I could also have a slice. I slather the peanut butter on thin unto the slice of multi grain bread using the back of a spoon. I fold it together and start eating as I walk towards my bags. I grab them and run downstairs because I don’t want to be late for our meeting at South. 

Dinner

South.

Nosa and I have a meeting here. 

To eat: I start with boneless wings. I share Nosa's main course with him. It's the French. This burger is in a league of its own when in comes to burgers in Lagos. The cheese isn't cheddar or anything basic, they use camembert in this.

Finally, I drink something that isn't water consciously. I order a berrified Moscow Mule. 

Daily Total: NGN 5000

Nosa subsidized my meal. You need a Nosa in your life. 

Wednesday

I skipped breakfast. I had a big dinner the night before so I wasn't really hungry anyway. 

I also skip snacks cause I'm watching my waistline and snacking is a sin. 

Lunch

The current caterers at my office have fallen off. I had “spag” + chicken + plantain. 

Dinner

I really put my back into my work out today so I get home exhausted and hungry. As a result, I eat a truck load of sweet potato and eggs. 

To Drink: water. 

Oh wait, I nearly forgot, one of the trainers at the gym is going away so they had a little send off for him. I had a really really sweet non-alcoholic fruit drink. 

Daily Total: NGN 0

Thursday

Finally, it’s the last day of this food diary thing.

Again, I skip breakfast. Whomever replaces the current caterers at my office really needs to step up the breakfast game. I go to my desk and break the seal on my bottle of Nestle water. That's my breakfast. 

I’ve seriously cut down on my snacking. There was a time when I ate a daily So Yummy popcorn and mini Pringles pack. I’ve come a long way. Today, I simply have a pack of Digestive’s - 3 biscuits.

Lunch is half a wrap of pounded yam. A colleague overheard me on the lunch line say I wanted just half so he asks for the other half. There's zero waste. I eat this with egusi and two meat. 

To Drink: Water

Dinner

This is probably the most food I ate over this entire period. My team won a competion within our company so the prize was a catered meal of our choice or a meal at a restaurant of our choice (we had a budget sha). We got Chef Imoteda to cater the meal for us at the office. 

We had ribs, corn bread, chicken wings, herb rice, mac & cheese, and lamb on the menu. 

We ate family style and I'm not ashamed but I had a little bit of everything. 

To Drink: Chi Orange & Peach Nectar. 

As a type this, I have a delicious looking caramel cupcake staring at me on the table. It's my dessert from dinner but I was overstuffed so I saved it for later. I think I’ll have it for breakfast tomorrow morning. 

Update: I forgot the cupcake at home before going to work. My dad might eat it before I'm home.

Update 2: He did :)

Daily Total: NGN 0

Week Total: NGN 9000

This has revealed to me that I get by in Lagos by mooching off my office, dad and Nosa. Don’t be like me.

I don't truly believe that, get you a Nosa and a daddy and you'll be as lit as me.