Hotel Brunches: The Wheatbaker

The Wheatbaker

4 Lawrence Road. Ikoyi, Lagos

01 277 3560

NOSA: Over the weekend, I got hit with the worst food poisoning. At like 3am on Saturday, I was convinced I was going to die in my own vom.

FOLLY: That's actually TMI. 

NOSA: All signs point to the Crust & Cream pizza I had for dinner. Imagine getting food poisoning from a shit pizza. Not only did I not enjoy it, I got sick. 

FOLLY: Poor boy looked so sick that his eyes were slanty. 

NOSA: Meanwhile, how do women handle cramps. I thought I was about to die when my stomach cramps started.

FOLLY: LOL

NOSA: We've been here for the blog before. Well, I was. Didn't pay for the meal either so it was definitely due a revisit. 

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FOLLY: I wanted us to go to the Grillroom but Nosa needed food quickly so we did the buffet instead.

That bread roll you see above was at least 576 emoji flames. The bible says man cannot live by bread alone but I could probably live on that bread alone...until I start craving cake, which is a type of bread tbh. 

NOSA: Because I was barely hanging on for my life, I played it safe with the buffet. Normally, I’d start with my usual peppersoup, but not on this day. They had oxtail peppersoup and I wasn’t trying to take any risks with dodgy meat.

NOSA: Considering how stale the pita bread was, the croissant was surprisingly fresh. The potato salad wasn’t half bad either. 

FOLLY: Nah, the pita bread was like cabin biscuit and the hummus was average. 

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NOSA: The main is always the hardest part when you hit the buffet floor. I always want to try everything so here’s a little tip from me to you: try everything.

NOSA: The pasta was weaksauce, but the teriyaki chicken was a zillion flame emojis. Shoutout to The Wheatbaker for that. I got their other potato salad too. This one wasn’t very good.

FOLLY: I don't know what Nosa is talking about but the frozen teriyaki chicken my dad used to buy from the overseas is better. I preferred the lamb dish which is on the left in the picture below. 

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FOLLY: I hadn't eaten rice in a week on Sunday so I decided to break my rice fast. The fried rice was very meh - it lacked salt and the veggies in it were of varying levels of crunchiness.

My mixed vegetables had all those imported vegetables like zucchini, butternut squash and broccoli. While all you #BuyNaijatogrowtheNaira activists will not be impressed, I liked it.

POSTCRIPT

NOSA: Considering how much you pay, The Wheatbaker’s brunch buffet is pretty poor. Just carry yourself to Southern Sun. 

FOLLY: It's way too much. I wanted to give them back the food when I saw the bill. They also charged separately for water and juice, that was not okay.

VERDICT

DAMAGE

Brunch Buffet - N9900

 

 

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